Post by edricz on Oct 8, 2005 22:29:50 GMT 7
*European English*The European Commission has just announced an
agreement whereby English will be the official
language of the European Union rather than
German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government
conceded that English spelling had some room for
improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in
plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".
Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump
with
joy.
The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This
should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan
have
one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the
sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be
replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf
20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new
spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where
more komplikated changes are possible.
Gove rnments will enkourage the removal of double
letters which have always ben a deterent to
akurate
speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the
silent "e"
in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such
as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd
from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve
vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil
find
it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united
urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German
like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
~~For The Peace For The 3Peacesoft